Bucketlist

 The amount of work in the second week of school has caught me by surprise. In reality, it clearly states how much time each course will take per week. I don't think I completely understood what 42 hours of school work and 33 hours at Amazon looked like, until the week came to a close. I realized I needed to make some changes to my daily routine, and start managing time better. 

So, here we are. Middle of week 3 and I'm finishing up week 2. The assignments were very enlightening and lifted a lot of pressure that I had been holding for years. Let me explain. The assignment focus for the week was creating a bucket list. I loved the videos and articles written about "childhood dreams" and how it took a wild idea such as "being an astronaut" and broke it down to aspects of being the astronaut that were inspiring and possible.  I didn't think of it as "I specifically want to be an astronaut because I like discovery and floating in outer space", until now.

Before I wrote my own bucket list, I watched the music video "Live like you were dying". Even in the darkest days, love and adventure created joy. I was touched.

As I was writing my own personal bucket list, ideas started flowing rapidly. I wrote down 50. As I reflected on my list, I felt something I hadn't felt in a couple years; hope. Going through a divorce and loosing hope, it had been difficult to get it back. I saw myself as a grandmother to many grandchildren. I saw the adventures I still wanted to go on. I saw career opportunities that I felt hopeful for, and a life full of joy.

I called my daughter and we chatted about things on her bucket list. I enjoyed listening to her hopeful life of adventure and success. Helping her achieve her dreams was on my bucket list and made a connection where our dreams collide.

Feeling hope and having a vision for the future was something I had been missing. Now, a door has opened and I'm able to plan a life worth living.